Last time, we talked about the children self-management. Role model is very important for parent to play. Besides, taught them the basic skills, supporting is also important too. We have to understand that all the people, included child, are not easy to learn all the things in a short period, especially the self-management. If we hope the child could help to do a little bite housework, how to teach him?

Starting from the simple mission; for instances, set up the table before enjoy the meal, throw rubbish, get the clothes down from the clothes hangers…..etc. There are many mission could be done by child, and most parents could know how to teach their child to do. However, child will lack of patient to keep on doing? Why? 

Child has endless energetic, full of curiosity, and great potential to imitate. We could fully utilize them. Certainly, some children really prefer playing rather than working. If they knew that is game, they will start playing without hesitation. Similarly, provided that the works are changed to games or funny things, they would be attracted immediately. This is the first step. At this moment, apart from the creativity is patient. After they are being attracting by the “games”, parent still have something to do afterwards.

Many communication techniques, but encouragement is the simplest and most efficient, to say more positive as well as praised words. Despite he may not be succeed, at least they will not feel dismay. It tries to avoid the hard feeling or negative perception of that issue or environment. May be he cannot did it well, but don’t try to say something like, “you just a child, of course you cannot do it.”  Child looks for the encouragement all the time, you could say, “keep it slowly, do it more and more, you will succeed. It is normal for first time to do this.”

Assisting is not equal to help his to do all the missions. Standing behind of him is another type of supporting, and give him a hand at the right time. Even though some children will not feel comfortable when they feel somebody “spying” them; the parent has to keep observing in the little distant, such as sitting on the sofa but waiting for requesting “help”. Thereupon, they could feel your respect for giving freedom to him, and child will learn how to cope with the problem independently.

If you want your child to be a little helper, you could give the missions to them gradually. Teach them the fundamental techniques first, and then showing your positive and encouraging attitudes, add some patient, spare the time and space to share. The more interesting element you adopt, the easier way for child to start and learn. This is their game rule!

Eddy

Psychotherapist